Breastfeeding in Public

...one of my long-held goals and dreams for myself, realized today.

One of my new mom pals, Laura, called me to see if I wanted to meet her at the coffee shop for some lunch. I LEAPT at the chance. I had actually been thinking of calling her this morning to go for a walk, despite the threat of rain. So we went. Andrew Bodhi and I packed up and met our friends, Laura and Lulu.


I try to do a little something that will get us out of the house and give us human contact with the outside world at least once a day. If I only plan to do TWO things max, like 1) grab food at a cafe and 2) hang out in the park, all can stay pretty well under control. It's when I try to do THREE things that all hell breaks loose and things fall apart.

I took Lanell's advice and made my own nursing top out of a long tank; I cut slits for the boobs to poke through, and wore a t-shirt over it. That way the belly stays covered when the t-shirt comes up to feed the baby. CLEVER.

But feeding in public was going to be no picnic, I anticipated that. Little Bodhi is going through his phases, fussing a lot at the breast before re-integrating and settling in to nurse. I feel that he has sooo much to say, so much to express. He's a Talker!

Trust me, I will not try to quiet him in any way.

So anyway, we made it out of the house, ate at the coffee shop, talked a bit, and went to the park down the street. (Yes, we ate standing up, and we had to keep moving like sharks, but we did it.) There were lots of mamas and kids. We were there for a couple of hours. At one point, AB performed a trajectory spit up down my cleavage and all over my yoga mat. (We brought our mats and a blanket out with us.) I'm realizing that being a mom might be akin to sitting in the front row of a Gallagher or Gwar show.

But what the hell; I always loved being outdoors and getting messydirty when I was a kid, a total tomboy. We can get a good hosing-down in at the end of the day.

So what I'm trying to say is that I DID IT. With Laura's encouragement and support, and the great outdoors around us, I NURSED MY BABY IN PUBLIC. And he loved it. The ghetto nursing top totally worked. Only about 1/4 of my boob was showing, less than Janet Jackson at halftime. Who gives a damn, anyway? I was a breastfeeding mama in the wild!

The Bodhi man loves being outside, can't take his eyes off the sky or the trees. It's a beautiful thing to watch. He was grabbing handfuls of leaves and grass (not so easy to pry out of tiny baby hands) and practiced squealing at the top of his lungs for quite some time. He even fell asleep for awhile.

Laura and I were talking about making the adjustment (the TRANSITION) into being mamas, how it didn't really sink in until we were giving birth. And now these little creatures are going to be with us always. If we're lucky!

I think I had a better grasp on the concept of becoming a Mother than I had on the concept of suddenly becoming a FAMILY. Here we are, baby makes three. Every day is full of negotiations, surrender, spontaneity and even a little grief. We'll make it though, I think.

Bern often talks of "incubating" as a family, and I love that idea. There are days and nights when the best thing to be is alone, our little family unit, holed up at home or in a tightknit triad out in public, supporting and loving and interacting with one another.

And meanwhile, I can practice and hone my mama skills by doing little things, like a day in the park with a friend.